If Dante were alive today, one of his circles of hell would have to be your boat getting stuck in Disney’s “Small World” ride and having to listen to “It’s a Small World After All” for all of eternity.
So I guess we should be thankful that callers to the Department of Education who are put on hold will listen to “Conjunction Junction” from Schoolhouse Rock instead. It’s catchy and clever, but only if you’re on hold for just a minute or two.
Still, “Conjunction Junction” is certainly better than the elevator music we usually get when we’re on hold, interspersed with a cheery voice telling us how important our call is to them even if it doesn’t seem like that.
Department Deputy Chief of Staff Matthew Yale says that “Conjunction Junction” is just one sign that “fun at the department is back.”
If that’s the case, let me make a few suggestions for songs that would promise even more fun while a caller is on hold. For starters, how about “The Wheels on the Bus Go ‘Round and ‘Round” sung by local kindergartners? There are hundreds of songs to choose from on Sesame Street, but I’d stick with the perennial favorites, “One Two Three Four Five” and “One of These Things Is Not Like the Others.”
There are so many other ‘fun” options: music from Saturday morning cartoons (“Here I come to save the day!”), music from “High School Musical” or “Glee.”
But the MOST fun for callers would be …… if someone answered the phone immediately.